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Sunday, November 11, 2012

I See You

Humans being are pretty basic creatures when it really comes down to it.  At least our physical bodies are.  We need sleep, food, water, climate control in the form of clothing and shelter and that's pretty much all it takes.  Pretty simple.  But when it comes to the inside, the root of who we are, it gets a bit more complicated.  We need all sorts of things to keep that part of us healthy and functioning.  Things like love, companionship, touch, communication and a purpose.  Most people have these things to some degree, but there is one thing I have seen a dire lack of in most everyone I have ever met.

We are unseen.

People see us and all that we are and see our values, our politics, our choices, our lifestyle and all those random things that define the life we have chosen to live.  Other people viewing our life make assumptions and for the most part, they are inaccurate.  Because they aren't really SEEING us.  Not our heart, our soul or our intentions.  Those things hidden so deep within us that it would appear they could never be found, but because we all carry around the unseen virture within us, you'd think it would be easy to recongize in others.  But that's not the case.

Think about someone that you know in your life that would completely disagree with you on any point you hold dear.  I'm not talking about a person who has severe emotional issues, just someone who views the world a bit different than you do.  Really think about that person and all they stand for and ask yourself, is there any common ground there?  You might be coming up blank.  I know in the past, I certainly have.

But something changed within me when my son Matthew passed away. I started SEEING people.  On the way to the hospital to meet with our specialists, I heard a traffic report on the radio about an accident that involved a person badly hurt on a bicycle.  Prior to this moment in my timeline, I would have only heard the information that affected me, personally....that there was a street I should avoid because traffic was heavy.  This time I heard the whole thing.  A person was badly hurt.  A person with a family, with people, with a life and they were suffering.  It was all so vivid in my mind that all those stories about tragedy happening to *someone else* was now happening to me.  This was a huge turning point in my life and when I feel my eyes were truly opening to all these human beings around me and who they were.  I finally saw them.

You see, no matter what a person believes, no matter what lifestyle they've embraced, no matter who they cast a vote for on a ballot, what they do for a living, who they worship or who they are, they have something in common with you.  They love.  They hurt.  They have been burned.  They have experienced incredible highs and incredible lows and wondered what the point of life was at all. And there you have, my friend, your common ground.  We all come at this life with expectations and desires and I have yet to find a person who wasn't doing all they were doing without a specific purpose in mind.   We all seek the same thing: To make sense of this life, to live it according to our own conscience and to enjoy the rather small number of days we get to breathe on this planet.  Yes, we speak different langages than a lot of people we know, but we're all still talking.

I have an incredible amount of views, lifestyles, politics and religion represented in the group of people I call my friends.  I think there is more we disagree on, than agree on, but what we have in common is enough to hold our friendship together. We have respect, love, curiosity, a willingess to listen and learn and see another side of a coin we hadn't considered before.  In the end, these people SEE me and I SEE them.  As people.  As companions.  As friends.

There's nothing more precious to me than to truly be seen by people I care for.  Not just seen but SEEN.  If ever I had one wish for humanity, this would be it. For people to look past themselves and past the outer shell of a person and their issues, and see the person inside.

It's a truly beautiful thing, indeed.

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