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Tuesday, November 6, 2012

Who's Afraid Of The Big, Bad Blog?

Uhm, me.  Or I used to be.  Seriously, I've had a couple blogs before and I quit them.  Not because I didn't love writing them, but I was afraid of putting myself out there too much.  The internet is a huge place and once you put something out there, it's out there to stay.

So what changed my mind?  Well, this is odd, but I am going to share it.  It was the realization that right now, there is a person, or many people out there, that will hate every single thing I do, say, think, or feel.  It's true.  My very existence will offend someone.  Once I finally grabbed a hold of that concept and really chewed on it for a bit, I became okay with it.  I mean, sure, we all want to be liked, but to be liked across the board is just impossible. 

I don't know if it's an age thing (and I will say I LOVE being in my thirties.  I don't even mind that I've swapped out my anti-blemish beauty products for the ones that fight aging.  Totally worth it, in my opinion.  You couldn't pay me enough to go back in time....) or if it's life experience...I don't know, but I've found that being an truly authentic version of yourself, while scary at times, is simply the only way to live an excellent life.  Being authentic is like installing a filter.  Those who are offended by who you truly are get weeded out and only the ones that like you (that consequently YOU will like) get close enough to make any impact on your immediate environment.  Bottom line is if someone doesn't like you, chances are, you wouldn't like them, so they really aren't worth the effort.

Or maybe it's watching my children interact with the online world. My son has a thriving YouTube channel and every so often he gets some really nasty comments.  He completely shrugs them off.  He has been raised with such confidence (and empathy) that he immediately understands that the problem isn't on his end, but on the other.  He understands that if someone is willing to make some random, derogatory comment, they have an issue within themselves that has nothing to do with him.  I stand in awe that he doesn't start questioning himself, or run away and hide.  He just goes on about his day, not thinking twice about it.  Doesn't affect him in the least.  To me, that's just awesome (Proud Momma moment!!)

I've asked myself many times, over the course of many years, why are people so mean?  Seriously, what makes a person attack another person?  Why are we so offended and so vicious?  I wish I had an answer.  I don't.  But what I do know is if someone takes the time to attack another person, it truly is about the person themselves.  There's something there....anger, jealousy, discontentment, PMS, something and they unleash it on whomever they deem an appropriate target.  It has nothing to do with positive, constructive encouragment.  It's not a building up, it's a tearing down and the fact is, since I am not interested in learning those particular skills, those kinds of people don't register on my radar as something to concern myself with.  They have no particular aspect of their person that I want to understand or emulate.  They have nothing to ADD to my life (or anyone else that chooses to put themselves out there) and so really, every minute, or second, or nanosecond that I spend on that person, is truly wasted. 

We can all hold different opinions.  We can agree to disagree.  We can state respectfully that a certain aspect of someone's life doesn't mesh well with our own, but the bottom line is, you can ALWAYS, (without exception) say what you want to say, KINDLY.  There is never an excuse to belittle, condemn, trash, or abuse another person.  Like ever. 

I finally got to a place in my life where I am no longer afraid.  I finally can say (Oh man, this is dorky, and lame) I truly like the person I am.  I like to believe that I am an asset to those who know me, rather than a liability.  That I am a blessing, rather than a burden.  And nothing anyone says can change that.  Life isn't a popularity contest, where truths about oneself is up for debate or a vote.  It is what it is.  You're either a good person, or you're not.

So the big, bad blog is out there now.  And the readers, eventually, might huff and puff and try with all their might to blow this house down, but I'm good with that now.  Not afraid.

Besides we all know how that story ended and the wolf totally got his ass kicked.  And while I think he kind of had it coming, I like to think maybe he just had a serious hankering for bacon, and the grocery store was out so he was being all solution oriented and stuff, but in reality, we all know he was just a jack-hole and the story ended as it should have.  Good conquers evil and all that good stuff.  Not sure about conquering the nay-sayers of the world, or even killing them, but I might be up for some sort of medical experimentation that would install mute buttons on certain individuals. 

Which reminds me.  It's ELECTION DAY.  Go vote.  And blog.  Without fear ;)  Blogging is fun!

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